Sin and Salvation

The essence of sin is we human beings substituting ourselves for God, while the essence of salvation is God substituting himself for us. We…put ourselves where only God deserves to be; God…puts himself where we deserve to be.  (John Stott, The Cross of Christ)

Hmmmmm.

I’m not an ER fan (I think I’ve only seen one episode). Should I be?
Discuss.

Definitions: Some Thoughts on Forgiveness

One of the bright spots that has emerged through the darkness of Sunday’s tragic shootings has been the declarations of forgiveness from the family and friends of the victims. Christians have taken notice and, quite significantly, so has the press.* As more than one person has said to me, we ought to be grateful for the positive example of people living out their faith in a forgiving God.

Others, however, have not been quite so sure. In a recent conversation, someone had the courage to suggest what many of us may have thought–that perhaps it was too soon to offer forgiveness, that maybe doing so trivialized what was, by all accounts, a very terrible wrong, or that doing so may have rushed a grief process in which anger would have played an important role.

These are all legitimate concerns–but I think they may stem from a misunderstanding of forgiveness. So a few thoughts today on what forgiveness does–and does not–involve.**

• Forgiveness is not a one time event. The individuals affected by Sunday’s shootings declared their forgiveness almost immediately. However, it will take time for them to grow into this declaration. As I mentioned in a sermon on this topic last month, they will have to forgive–to make moves against their anger–again, and again, and again (seventy times seven!). I suspect that for some of these people (perhaps all of them) it will take years for forgiveness to be complete. As Smedes says, “Forgiving is a journey; the deeper the wound, the longer the journey.”
• Forgiveness does not mean condoning or excusing a wrong. In fact, forgiveness means the opposite. To forgive someone of a wrong, you must acknowledge that there is actually a wrong to be forgiving. To forgive, you must assign blame. When we forgive, we are not saying that the intolerable has suddenly become tolerable. Rather, we are saying that the only way we can deal with an intolerable wrong is through the miracle of forgiveness.
• Forgiveness does not mean minimizing a wrong. Saying “I forgive you” is not the same thing as saying, “That’s okay–it was no big deal.” If it’s not a big deal, it doesn’t need to be forgiven. As Lewis Smedes has written somewhere, “We need to sort out our hurts and learn the difference between those that call for the miracle of forgiveness and those that can be borne with a sense of humor. If we lump all our hurts together and prescribe forgiveness for all of them, we turn the art of forgiving into something cheap and commonplace. Like good wine, forgiving must be preserved for the right occasion.”
• Forgiveness is not the same thing as reconciliation. Reconciliation may be seen as the ultimate (though not always attainable) goal of forgiveness. However, forgiveness is only one step in achieving this goal. For full reconciliation to occur, the person who committed the wrong must also make a move–must “repent” in the biblical sense of the word (express both sorrow AND a commitment to change). If the person who committed the wrong has not changed, it would be unwise–even foolish–to enter back into relationship with them. In short, it takes one person to forgive but two to achieve full reconciliation.
• Forgiveness does not mean there are no consequences. God (and good parents, I think) may forgive the sins of His children but deem it important for them to live with the consequences of their poor choices. Sometimes when we forgive people, it is also necessary that they live with painful consequences. This can be an important a way of protecting ourselves from future hurts.
• Forgiveness does not mean forgetting: Forgiveness has more to do with the way we remember than with removing our memories. When we forgive, we learn to remember without anger or a desire for revenge. Furthermore, in a sin filled world, remembering the wrong we’ve forgiven can be important because of the need to protect ourselves from future hurts.
• Forgiveness is not something we only do for other people: Scripture makes clear that forgiveness is one of the ways we show Christ-like love for other people. However, it’s also a way we love ourselves. When we refuse to forgive, we are held captive by our own anger and bitterness–it eats away at us and threatens to consume us. As Smedes writes: “When we forgive, we set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner we set free is us.”

*It says something about the nature of forgiveness that it is considered newsworthy event.

 **Many of these come from Lewis Smedes’ excellent book, The Art of Forgiving.

More on Matthew 18

“Forgive us our debts, as we’ve forgiven our debtors.” Most of us have probably squirmed at that little phrase in the Lord’s prayer. We squirm because we all struggle to forgive from time to time–and a simple reading of that phrase makes it sound like God’s forgiveness is contingent upon our own; it sounds as though we can somehow loose our place in his household if we fail to do what we’re told.

The Lord’s Prayer isn’t the only nugget of scripture that might give you that impression. You might think that after reading the parable that we studied together on Sunday morning, too (Matt 18:21-35). This poor schmuck is forgiven a huge debt, fails to pass it on, and apparently loses his forgiven status. You might read this parable and conclude that God’s forgiveness is fickle.

It’s troubling and we ought not try to explain it all away too quickly. But some comments I read this weekend in NT Wright’s book, Evil and the Justice of God, helped me make sense of it (without making Jesus’ teaching easier than it really is). Here’s what he says about Jesus’ command to forgive in this passage:

“Jesus is not giving a kind of arbitrary, abstract commandment and then saying that if you fail to meet the test God will not forgive you. He isn’t setting the moral bar at an impossible height and then warning that God will be everlastingly cross if we don’t manage to jump it. He is drawing attention to a fact about the moral universe and human nature. He is telling us, in effect, that the faculty we have for receiving forgiveness and the faculty we have for granting forgiveness are one and the same thing. If we open the one we shall open the other. If we slam the door on the one, we slam the door on the other. God is not being arbitrary. If you are the sort of person who will accuse a neighbor over every small thing and keep him or her under your anger until each item has been dealt with (perhaps by your gaining revenge), then you are also the sort of person who will be incapable of opening your heart to receive God’s generous forgiveness. Indeed, you will probably not admit that you need it in the first place.” (158)